I don't want to digress from the main subject here-- the dreams-- but I must admit that dreaming of her is quite weird because during the two years we were together I never dreamt of her and now that I don't have her she comes to my mind.
And here lies my biggest doubt, is my subconsciousness trying to get rid of my memories of her?, or is it trying to bring her back to my life?
Honestly, I can't fucking figure it out (excuse my french) because none of the two dreams were memories, one was a fictional situation putting her back in my life ( I would love it to be like that) and the second dream was me asking her questions, trying to understand the reason of the break up and the reason why she has a new boyfriend in such a short time ( i think you can't forget 2 years of relationship in 2 -3 weeks especially if the days before the break up you were arranging things to live together).
No matter the reason for my dreams, I am sure that my subconsciousness is fucking me up, cuz I know it is impossible to be back together and I think that to forget is necessary not to remember. But, Obviously nothing is so easy, maybe these dreams has a connection to something i read the other day:
" The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone." Harriet Beecher Stowe
Probably my mind is trying to do what I did not do, and say what I did not say. because in the end
It Is What It Is.
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